A Childhood In "The Stacks"

There is something I have always loved about books.  One of my favorite places as a child was the Northborough Free Library.  They had this amazing children's room with places to lounge around and read Clifford The Big Red Dog or the Hungry Caterpillar, whatever you wanted.  Once I moved out of that room and into the "big kid area" I discovered Nancy Drew, the Boxcar Children and the Hardy Boys.  I loved that these seemingly tangible characters used their intellect and their problem solving skills to survive in the wilderness, figure out the mystery behind the old clock, and whatever else came their way all without the supervision of an adult.  I really identified with their insatiable curiosities.  I spent my summers climbing through the woods behind my childhood home, sitting outside watching meteor showers with my Dad, riding my bike so quickly down the Cherry Street hill that I would tip over and skin the bejesus out of my scrawny knees.  I secretly hoped that I would see a ghost in that library, a la Ghostbusters I guess.  I loved the smell of the old books, their crunchy pages and crumbling bindings.  I loved reading the library checkout cards to see the last time someone took it home and how long it had been in circulation.  I never dreaded looking for books in the card catalogue, the organized files mesmerized me.  Yes, I was an elementary school kid, and yes, it was odd.  There was just something about being a child with a very colorful imagination that made everything at that library so incredibly interesting.

I'm sure that if you asked my parents about this they would agree that I did have a very colorful imagination.  I loved to sing with tapes and records, put on "plays" in the living room, and build forts out of anything nearby.  I do not believe that they would think I had had a thing for organization or cleanliness.  In fact, I don't even think my husband would disagree with that last sentence.  The truth is, I loved the library because I had a fascination with learning about and understanding life's mysteries.  To a child, the world is a wondrous, somewhat frightening place and I had a thirst to learn everything about it.  To me, everything in this world is a puzzle with thousands of tiny pieces.  But, like with all puzzles, you must find the edges before you can put together the middle and see the big picture.  The library was the place where I found my edges.

About Me.

For some reason, I feel that every good blog must have a great introduction; a foundation from which the readers can hopefully understand where the author is coming from.  This is probably not going to be a best introduction, but whatever.  So... here it is, my version of an intro.  Just a warning, I am an avid list maker so you'll most likely see this format again.

1. I am a 20 (almost 30) something with a stable marriage, a stable career, a mortgage, and a couple of fur babies.
2. I live in Jayhawk Country.
3. I am married to the most patient man in the world.  
4. I must also mention that I'm married to MacGyver.  The man could build you a full size sedan out of a broken cork screw and a small piece of wire.  I'm serious.
5. I come from a corporate family and lived a corporate childhood.  I wouldn't trade it for anything.
6. I have moved a total of 13 times and have lived in 7 states.  Please refer to point number three.
7. If I could compare my parents to any public figures it would be like this:  My dad is like Bill Gates with the discipline of a highly decorated military officer, and my mother is like Martha Stewart except a whole lot nicer and way prettier... she can make anything beautiful.  Their marriage is inspirational and incredibly rare in our society.  
8. I am the oldest child.  My sister and I are incredibly different and incredibly alike at the same time.  It's fascinating. 
9. I was a band geek and a closeted academic in high school.
10. I have a degree in political science, a subject which I must implore everyone to never bring up during a conversation with me.  
11. I spend a ton of time knitting, cooking, and reading.  Oh, and I am also one of those backyard chicken freaks.
12. I deeply identify with Hermione Granger and Hillary Clinton at the same exact time.  
13. I am wicked good at Scrabble.
14. I find comfort in organizing Excel spreadsheets.. yes, I'm serious.
15. I have a cosmetology license and practiced for about six years before I finally admitted that I can't talk comfortably to strangers.  
16. I am now a banker and I love my cubicle.  
17. I love to figure out how things work and I love to make people think that the end result just magically happened.
18. I'm constantly on a mission to pump up my resume.  I want it to blow some bigwig's mind.
19. The most ridiculous things make me happy.  Think.. fuzzy puppy YouTube videos and baby ducks walking across the street.
20. I really cannot wait to be an old crazy cat lady.  It's going to be so awesome.  
21. I drive a tiny car like a crazy Chicagoan on the streets of Kansas.  Don't look at my driving record.
22. I have to end this list with an even number.  I can't help it. 

Hello.

I've tried this before, this blogging thing.  Each time I sit down and try to think of clever things to say, pretty pictures to show and to make an attempt to be some sort of authority on a subject I hardly know anything about.  I might as well be a fraud.  I want to write about something I know.

The truth is that I'm intensely private.  Everything I say has been rehearsed and revised before the words are even uttered.  I have a strong sense of what is, and what isn't appropriate to share with others; a rubric which I have strictly adhered to all of my life.  To let someone in is not very much different than being admitted into a secret underground society.  I will not speak freely unless I feel that it is "safe."  This may explain why so many people see me one way, while my family and close friends see me as totally the opposite.

I guess writing a blog is a way to blend those two worlds.  The one where I must seem like a stand-offish, reserved woman, and the other where it must seem like I can't keep my damn opinions to myself.  This is where I'll write the words which I can't seem say out loud.  This is where I'll show that being and introvert is beautiful.

hello.